Disclaimer: Don't know, don't own, don't sue.

***

I remember it like it was yesterday. My mom and dad had been in their room for three hours. My brother Alex and I were sitting on my top bunk, talking about how bad the week had been, but every couple of minutes, we would burst out laughing at the thought of what our parents could possibly be doing in their room for so long. Alex was my best friend, and was the only person who could love me and comfort me, no matter how much shit I was going through. Because he was only fifteen months older than me, Alex understood me like no one has ever been able to, and he was very easy to talk to because we shared so many of the same interests and personality traits. Anyways, my brother was in the middle of telling me about his 87-year-old math teacher, when he stopped, winked twice, and nudged me in the stomach. I turned towards the door as my parents were walking into my room.

"Good. I'm glad you two are together. We... uh, we need to... discuss something... with you," my mom choked out. I caught a glimpse at my dad, and the expression on his face gave me an uneasy feeling. He looked lonely, mad, tired, scared, and sad. It was at that moment that I knew that they weren't fucking in their bedroom that night.

"Alex, Mika, come sit down on the bottom bunk," my dad ordered. We obeyed. Mom and Dad pulled up two chairs and sat about four feet away from us.

"Okay, honeys," my mom started. "You know that you're father and I love you so much, and always will, right?"

My brother and I exchanged puzzled glances, then turned back to face my mom. "Yes, mom," we replied, in a bored tone.

"Well, um, you see. You're father and I... well, we have been, err... " Mom stopped for a minute to collect her thoughts, I guess. She looked down towards the floor, and I thought I saw her tearing up.

My dad stepped in. "Your mother and I have been having some problems that we don't think we can work out. We have been discussing this all night, and have decided that it would be best for us to get a divorce. I'll be moving to the other side of Jersey when we get the papers signed."

At first, I let out a small laugh, and looked at my mom's and dad's face to see if they were joking. They were not. My face fell, and my eyes welled up with tears. They loved each other more than they loved life itself; I knew they did! They told me they did, dammit! I hugged my knees close to my chest and let the tears slowly pour down my face, and I felt a strong hand rub me sympathetically on my back. I knew it was Alex. Once I had composed myself, I lifted my head and looked straight at my dad, and then at my mom.

"Why are you doing this to me? Why are you fucking doing this to me?!" I screamed.

"Mika, sweetheart," my mom said in a calm, compassionate voice. "Everything will turn out fine, I promise."

Well, so far, nothing has turned out fine. At all. My dad won custody of me and my brother, so we have to move with him to the other side of the state. Although I love my dad, he doesn't really relate to me and Alex, so he doesn't talk to us much. I don't really care, though, but sometimes I just wish that I could have a dad that really cared about me, what I'm doing, and how I'm feeling.

Today was the first day of tenth grade, and I was more than a little nervous. I was bullied in my old neighborhood, and I thought that maybe I could make a fresh start here in Newark. I sat up in my bed and looked around the room. My room was my sanctuary, and it spoke so much about me, and to me. It was dark, the color of my personality, moods, and life. I had a boyfriend several years ago, who brought out a different, brighter side of me. We were together for almost two years, but since he dumped me last spring, I have been lost in a world of bullies, struggles, and insecurities. My brother and my cello are the two reasons why I have refused to give up on my life. No matter how hard shit gets, I will always have my brother and my music.

I groggily got out of bed and walked over to the closet. I pulled back my long blond hair in a ponytail and put on a flowing bohemian skirt, a skintight "The Beatles" shirt, which hugged my voluptuous curves, my raggedy (but treasured) black high-tops, skeleton gloves, and a coat of black eyeliner. I loved what I wore, because it made me impossible to stereotype. As I walked out of my room, I saw something charging at me at out the corner of my eye. A fraction of a second later, my brother tackled me to the ground.

"Ah... What the fuck?" I screamed.

My brother, who sat cross-legged next to me, replied by pinching my check, scrunching up his nose, and making a kissy face at me. "It's your first day as a sophomore. That's pretty special to meee! I'm so... proud of you!" my brother let out a fake and highly exaggerated sob. "They grow up so fast!"

I rolled my eyes at my brother, and we got up to eat breakfast, laughing our way down the stairs. Our dad was sitting at the table, reading the newspaper. He didn't seem to notice that my brother and I were in the room until I called his name. He looked up from his paper.

"Yes?!" he said, in an annoyed tone. I hate how my dad always talked to us like he didn't want to. Geez, it's just the fucking paper. Get your priorities straightened out.

"Do you know any of the neighbors? We can't just live like hermits and not meet anyone around us." I asked. We had been living in the new house for not even three days, and in any spare time that we had from unpacking, we were sleeping.

My dad went back to reading the paper. "I don't know, Mika. I heard there were some kids your age around here somewhere."

My brother and I exchanged excited glances. There were no kids our age in our old neighborhood, so we were really looking forward to meeting them.

"Fuck," I mumbled inaudibly as I looked at the time. "Dad, we gotta go. Homeroom starts in fifteen minutes. See you tonight."

"OK. See you," my dad said, his eyes still glued to the fucking paper. Alex and I ran out to the blue Honda parked in our driveway. My brother's car looked like a piece of shit, but as long as it got us to where we needed to go, it was our best friend. Just as we were opening the car door, my brother and I saw two guys walking out of the house next to us.

One looked about my age. He was pretty skinny, and wore think, circular glasses. He looked like the typical computer nerd. There was something there that intrigued me, but I couldn't quite place it. The other looked a little older than me and Alex. He was a little heavy, but had such a sweet face. His dark hair contrasted with his pale skin in an angelic way.

Alex and I walked up to our two neighbors.

"Hi, I'm Alex, and this is my sister, Mika." The four of us shook hands. "We live in that house, right there." My brother pointed to our new house.

"Cool. I'm Gerard," the dark-haired kid said quietly, with a small smile. "This is my brother, Michael." The skinny kid flinched when he heard his name.

"I'm sorry. I'm Mikey, not Michael. Um, welcome to Newark."

"Thanks," Alex responded. "You guys going to Belleville High?"

"I am." Mikey said. "Gerard's starting his first day of art school today, in New York. I'm just a sophomore."

"Mika's a sophomore, also!" my brother exclaimed. I smiled slightly and looked towards my feet, and then up at Mikey.

"Maybe we have some of the same classes," Mikey said to me. I smiled and nodded my head.

"Well, it was nice meeting you, we've gotta go. See you guys around," Gerard said.

Alex and I waved as we walked towards the car. On the way to Belleville High, I felt like nothing could stop me. I was going to march into that school and let my true personality shine through. However, once my brother's car pulled up at the school, every feeling that I was experiencing vanished. I felt defenseless, uncertain, and nervous. My palms were sweaty, and I had a knot in my stomach. Alex parked the car, and we got out and started walking towards the school. I clutched my books tightly and walked cautiously while looking at the ground. My brother must have sensed my lack of confidence, because he stopped me by putting a hand on my shoulder and giving me a bear hug.

"Don't worry, Mi. It'll be different this year. It's a new school with new kids. Just try to make the best of it, k? And I'm here, too. So if any dickhead starts to pick on you, you just call me, and I'll kick their ass," Alex said. Even though I didn't feel any more secure, it felt good to know that there will always be at least one person there for you.

I flashed him a fake smile and we entered the school.

I reached my homeroom just seconds before the tardy bell rang. I sat down in the back a slumped in my seat.

"Great," I thought to myself. "Another fucking year."

My homeroom teacher, Mr. C, was calling role. I'm always the last one called, because my last name is Zellmer.

"My-kah? My-kah Zellmer?"

"It's pronounced Mee-kah, sir. I'm here." I replied in a quiet voice. Damn teachers can't pronounce anyone's names these days.

After homeroom, I headed to my first period: history. I cautiously walked into the classroom, and chose a seat in the middle of the room. I sunk down in my chair, and pulled out the book that I was reading. I was so engrossed in my book, that I didn't notice a figure had taken a seat on my desk and was staring at me. The figure cleared his throat, and I looked up at him impatiently. A smile crept across my face. It was Mikey! I wanted to say something to him, but I couldn't think of what to say. I just sat there, staring at him, and he did the same. I took in all of his features. He had a pretty small face, with nice cheekbones. I must admit, I was jealous. His glasses masked the most beautiful eyes I had seen in a while, and he had the nicest, most genuine smile. A door slammed and snapped me and Mikey both back to reality. I turned towards the door, and the teacher came sauntering in.

"OK, kids. Find a seat. Quickly now," she practically screamed.

Mikey got up off my desk and sat in the seat next to mine. He pushed his hair down further into his eyes, and looked down at his desk. He hardly changed his position for the entire class period.

The first half of the day was just a jumble of classroom rules and boredom. I was really looking forward to lunch, because I could see my brother, and get away from these loud, annoying students.

My brother's lunch period was ending as mine was beginning, so I could only talk to him for a couple minutes before he had to run off to class. After I caught up with my brother, I stepped into the lunch line. Mikey was in front of me, and I tapped him lightly on the shoulder.

I felt him shiver a little at my touch, and he turned around. "Hey, Mika. Um, what's up?"

"Nothing really," I responded. "So, uh, what's for lunch today?"

Mikey turned towards the food line. "Chicken patty sandwiches and tater tots. Mmmm," Mikey said sarcastically. I giggled at his facial expression.

"Hey, Mikey?" I tried to look Mikey in the eye, but he had a little trouble keeping eye-contact with me.

"Mmhmm?"

"Would you mind if I, um, maybe I could sit with you today? I don't really... uh, have anyone to sit with." I said nervously.

"Yeah! Yeah, definitely!" Mikey smiled.

We got our not-so-appetizing lunch and headed out into the lunchroom. I followed behind Mikey, and he motioned for me to walk next to him.

"So, Mika, tell me about yourself," Mikey said.

"Well... what would you like to know?" I responded quietly. I was dragging my feet and looking down at the ground.

"Anything you want to tell me," Mikey said.

I stopped walking and looked around, then at Mikey. We were outside the cafeteria, next to a door that I guessed led to the outside world. "Mikey, where the fuck are we going?"

"Ah. You'll see." And with that, Mikey pushed open the doors and walked around to the back of the school.

I wasn't quite sure where we were going or why he was so excited, because dirt and dumpsters weren't exactly the most beautiful things I had seen. We walked across the street, and I stopped suddenly. In front of me was a park, just an ordinary park to most people, but not to me. There were a couple pieces of trash on the ground, and several dead leaves, but beauty just radiated from this area. It was pure, solid nature in front of us, not jazzed up with fancy fountains or industrialized with buildings. Just plain nature. And it was gorgeous.

Mikey looked at my face, and I snapped out of my trance. "Let's go eat," he said.

I smiled considerably and walked over to a big oak tree. Mikey and I plopped down next to each other. I leaned back against the tree and closed my eyes. I felt the cool breeze touch the bare skin of my arms, and I smelled the fresh air. Maybe Newark won't be so bad after all. Maybe.

I opened my eyes and turned to look at Mikey. "You know, I kinda like this place. Newark, I mean. It's kind of like a diamond in the rough," I said, pushing the puffs of hair out of my eyes.

"Yeah. I mean, it's pretty rough here, and sometimes even people who have lived here their entire lives can't see the beauty in Newark. I guess that's how I try to live my life, just finding the beauty in something that not everyone thinks is so gorgeous." Mikey sat in silence for several seconds, and then dug into his chicken patty. "So what brings you to Newark? It's not exactly the ideal tourist spot."

"Oh. Um, you know. My parents divorced," I responded, and looked down at the tray sitting at my feet. I hated having to bring up the subject of divorce, because it just reminded me of how much I hate my dad and how much I miss my mom.

Mikey must have noticed this, because he reached his hand out to me, as if to pat or hug me sympathetically, but pulled it back. "I'm sorry, Mika. I didn't... I shouldn't... "

"No, no. It's OK, Mikey. I just, uh, I just didn't see it coming. I mean, I thought we were the perfect family. I guess not. Anyway, I guess it's pretty good, actually. I get to start a new life out here. Get rid of the old bullies and meet some new ones." I chuckled, and started to chow down on my lunch.

We ate in silence for the majority of the lunch period. But it wasn't an awkward silence; it was a beautiful one. I had finally made a friend, and it was an awesome feeling.